It’s been a busy few weeks, and I’ve neglected to share that several have mentioned that “they’ve enjoyed my Sabbath evening missives…”
A short note or letter on Friday night is just one of many tools we use to stay connected as a spiritual family, or house of God. In today’s busy world, Godly, uplifting, positive and direct open communication is more essential than ever.
The thing that has been at the front of my mind for some time, is this. As I mentioned in my Pentecost sermon message of recent, is we all anticipate the day when we God’s Ekklesia or church will marry Christ at the wedding to come.
Early this next week my wife and I will fly to Minnesota for a wedding. I’ll be marrying extended family members and a spiritual daughter in the faith to the man who she desires to spend the rest of her life with. It’s always an exciting time when there is a wedding where Christ is at the center!
As I reflect, and ponder, I recall Elizabeth Barrett Browning’s poem, “How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.”
There are many couples who are contemplating, anticipating, planning, getting up steam for, entertaining the hope of, chomping at the bit for, and looking forward to, marriage. My wife and I are all for marriage.
So, what are the ingredients for a happy, successful marriage? I’d say, a short list – Giving of yourself, Loving, Forgiving, Sacrificing, and Serving. This is all accomplished in two words, communication and togetherness.
Good marriage communication does not just happen. Webster defines communication as “to have a sympathetic or meaningful relationship”. That would be marriage at its best.
Exchanging information, attitudes, making things known, to give information, signals, in any way, whether by talking, gestures, or writing…is communication, and it’s not always just talking.
Sometimes the old adage of “Your actions speak louder than your words”… works best.
Keeping our mouths closed sometimes works wonders doesn’t it?
What about gestures-especially hands and eyes, inclusive of eyebrows? Our eyes talk, positively, giving approval-and sometimes negatively, unfortunately.
Eyebrows are most difficult to control when we disapprove. If you want to improve communication in marriage… think before you raise an eyebrow, or squint an eye. Be positive, Smile-even with your eyes.
In my travels out of the U.S. I’ve received much more positive results in tenuous situations when I smile. My relaxed face sometimes does not reflect that I’m happy, even though I really am. Some people simply just never smile… odd but true.
I’ve also noticed that in marriage we all don’t use the smile enough.
Marriage is a serious business, but never forget that smiles are icebreakers, and friendship makers. I’ve seen a smile melt a mountain of frosty silence.
Include hand gestures, body motions, touches, hugs, kisses. Ah, how delightful to live in a loving environment.
Communication is an age old concept, and there is not any substitute for it.
The great communicator, the Logos, (John 1:1) who became Jesus Christ, admonishes us to have Godly communication. He desires of us to practice, practice, and practice so that we might have perfect marriage communication. He’s the head of His church. When things are not going well in the body of Christ or in a marriage, we need to ask “Is the Great Communicator alive and vibrant within us, or is it just a facade?”
During the marriage ceremony, I’ll talk about two becoming one. I’ll talk about vows towards one another, with God at the center. We’ll visit submission to one another in the fear of the Lord (Ephesians 5:21). Communication is an absolutely fundamental ingredient for a happy marriage.
Working together, asking God to bless a marriage with good wholesome communication is something this world needs so dearly…
…as I close this letter, as I do every Friday evening… as we enter His Sabbath… reflect on this with me, will you?
And again, may God continue to richly bless you. Our prayers and thoughts are with you daily! Please do pray for us as well.
